A few days ago, friends hair circle said: I am “disobedient” mother.
Originally, she came home just caught the child to steal to play the computer, think of the child’s grades and fell, then on the child a scold.
It turned out that the child had learned to make carnations online and wanted to give her a special birthday present.
Suddenly feel and heart, and ashamed, blame their own impulse.
She was busy in the kitchen when the baby knocked over a basin of water, one friend wrote below.She was annoyed that the child was making trouble.
After she finished, the child said, “I just wanted to help with the dishes,” which moved her and made her feel guilty.
We always sigh in their broken heart, but the children are not sensible.In fact, our children know everything, he will be careful to love and give.
Most of the time it is not the children who are disobedient, but we are disobedient.
Some time ago, Yuan Yongyi revealed on a variety show that the relationship between her and her son was very tense, and her son did not want to say a word more with her.
One day, the son is still very serious and his father said: “I want to change the mother!”
Why is that?
The psychiatrist told Yuan that the problem was not the child, but that she might be too self-centered.
For example, there are some things that she feels are not good for her children, so she can’t help rejecting them outright.
When her son failed in the exam, she criticized him. The boy didn’t even have a chance to defend himself, so he had to swallow all the words from his heart.
Time after time, day after day, the son became more and more dissatisfied and resentful of her.
Good parent-child relation, abruptly became “enemy person” relation.
In reality, many children, the older they get, the less they talk to their parents.
My cousin complained more than once that her nephew in fifth grade had little to say to her.
Come home from school, say “Mom, I’m home” straight into the room, shut the door.More often than not, not even this greeting.
She cautiously knocked on the door and asked, “How were you at school today?”
The nephew said, “I’m fine,” and when she wanted to ask more questions, the child dismissed him with, “I have to do my homework.”
Several times, when she asked him about his studies at the dinner table, he would say impatiently, “You don’t understand.”
When I asked my nephew why, he said, “I used to talk to my mom, and she either didn’t have time or she was staring at her phone all the time. I was done. She was still saying, ‘What?'”
We always sigh, and children how more and more have nothing to say?
Too often, the grown-ups cut in rudely again and again, ignoring the child’s desire to connect with us.
If we want children to talk, we must first learn to listen.
Reprint indicated source：Spark Global Limited information