The writer Hemingway has a famous saying about speaking: “It takes two years to learn to speak, but it takes a lifetime to learn to shut up.”
Speaking is an art.Can speak, is a skill;Knowing when to be silent is the most difficult practice in one’s life.
A man is measured, in fact, when getting along with others, speak and act in a measured way.
Not to ask questions, not to talk nonsense, not to say, is the measure of speaking, is also the size of a man.
It is kind not to ask
People are very stubborn animals, knowing that there are tigers in the mountains, inclined to tiger mountain line, do not hit the south wall, never look back.
Everyone has a knot in his heart. If he can’t untie it, he will never let it go.
But not everything needs to be checked out and asked.
People live, sometimes wise is a sin, confused will be more relaxed and happy.
In the sitcom seinfeld, there is a character named George.
Once, George went to volunteer at a community nursing home.
The man he helped was 86 years old. His partner had died and he lived alone in a nursing home, but every day he was very happy.
George was puzzled when he saw this fact. He didn’t understand how anyone could be so happy after all.
So he kept asking the old man:
“Are you afraid?You don’t know how many years you’re gonna live, do you?How can you be so close to death and not be afraid?You must be in great pain, aren’t you?”
At last the old man could bear it no longer and said a word angrily: “Go away!”
The reason why the old man did this is obvious.
For as George pressed, he was cutting open the wounds that the old man did not want to be seen.
Truly moral people don’t do that.
For example, Dong Qing once faced xu Jinglei, a star who burst into tears in The Reader, without further questioning the reason for her collapse for the sake of the program effect.
Because understand, so compassionate.
Everyone has some secret deep in his heart, some relatively heavy past, do not want others to know, more do not want to be asked deeply.
It is cruel to others to only satisfy one’s curiosity to discover others’ scars.
Most of the time, do not ask, is a kind of dignified kindness.
It is a kind of cultivation not to talk in error
“Zhuangzi” said: “the son is not a fish, know the joy of fish.
This means don’t try to make assumptions about people without knowing them well, let alone making judgmental comments about them.