Some say, “A dutiful son comes from under the stick.”It is said that praise is the best nourishment for children’s growth.So when to be tough and when to be pompous?How to educate, how to praise?The “you are so great” hanging in the mouth, casually praise the child, and random beat scold children, are irresponsible perfunctory.
“Positive discipline” is an education concept put forward by Jane Nelson, an outstanding American psychologist and educator. She advocates neither punishment nor pamper, but let children develop self-discipline, responsibility, cooperation and the ability to solve problems by themselves in a kind and firm atmosphere.
Jane Nelson, a mother of seven and grandmother of 18, has spent 10 years as a teacher of elementary and college child development counseling.
When children stay in bed always late, when children do not do their homework well, when children with mobile phones do not give up, when children are not polite to the elders, disrespect……
Parents will try their best to talk sense to their children, but many times, you wear out your mouth, the children just don’t listen.Your bitter heart, have become the child’s ears.
The parent who “no matter what, the child won’t listen” is pathetic, it means that he has lost the respect and trust of the child and is pulled into the blacklist of communication by the child.
Adele Farber and Elaine Mazlich are renowned parent-child communication experts and authors of the best-selling parent-child education book in the United States. “How to Talk So Kids Listen So Kids Talk” is the conclusion of a long-running study they conducted with parents at schools and research institutes they founded.They are also mothers of three children and know their parents’ confusions.
Around “how to speak” and “how to listen”, this book is discussed and practiced from six aspects, including helping children face their feelings, methods instead of punishment, letting children release from the role, and so on.
The author has created a set of operation methods, given the realization of these six aspects of 30 kinds of skills, supplemented by a large number of common scenes and problems to illustrate, and with the corresponding exercises, so that parents can use these skills flexibly, at any time to deal with various situations, do with ease.
Everyone wants to feel understood and validated, and these communication skills are not just for talking to children. Talking in the other person’s shoes and understanding their emotions and needs can be applied to all of your relationships.
We have all heard the saying that the amount of water a bucket can hold is determined by its shortest piece of wood.
Affected by this saying, we always pay special attention to our weak points and spend our energy on improving our weak points. Finally, we become an average person. However, we ignore our real strengths, lose our strengths, and become like everyone else.
When Qian Zhongshu applied for Tsinghua University, he got good marks in Chinese and English, but only got 15 points in mathematics. After talking with him, the headmaster Luo Jialun decided to “break the rules”, which led to “Fortifications Fortifications” and “Guanzhuan”.
Showing irreplaceable advantages in some aspect is more conducive to our development than improving our weaknesses.
Parents are the 24/7 CEO of their children, taking charge of their food, clothing, transportation, physical and mental development.Whether he is confident or self-abased depends on what kind of eyes his parents look at him.